My teenaged son walked in the door from school and I caught a glimpse of my father. It was fleeting, lasting only milliseconds, but for a tiny moment in time, I could see the way my father’s features had melded with my son’s. And, as it happens during those moments, my heart broke a little […]
When Cancer Came To My Family, The Hidden Stresses Were Surprising
I was compensated by Med-IQ through educational grants from AbbVie, Astellas, and Genentech to write about managing distress for cancer patients and their caregivers. All opinions are my own. When my phone buzzed in my pocket, I was filing papers on a brisk January morning. I smiled when I saw my Dad’s number pop up on my […]
Since Moms Have To Do Everything Anyway, I’m Writing My Eulogy, Too
When you die, what will people say about you? What will the people around you choose to fit into a teeny tiny column in the paper in the midst of their angst over your untimely demise? Will your eulogy be the standard issue “He was born, he was an engineer, he was a Knight of […]
My Father Died And My Kids Had Questions I Wasn’t Prepared To Answer
It is often said that to really experience life, you should see it through the eyes of a child. Never is that more true than when there is a death in the family. On October 4, 2012, my father passed away expectedly unexpectedly. He had been battling esophageal cancer for 9 months and while doing […]
The Day I Listened To The Voices In My Head
I can still see her as she barreled in the door on a bright Fall day, ponytails swishing, a jumbled mass of pink, mismatched stripes and costume jewelry. She was fresh out of school and had sprinted the entire way home without breaking a sweat. As she did every single day, she burst into the […]
ApPARENT Loss
In the last six months, I’ve had seven friends lose their mothers unexpectedly, the most recent of which was this past Friday. Seven friends. That boils down to *almost* once a month since the beginning of the year that I’ve gotten a phone call that a friend is in crisis. Seven close friends who have […]
Road Trips Were Different When I Was A Teen And I’m Grateful
My dad loved a good road trip. When I was young, he’d spend months planning cross country trips for us to take every July. Since this was in the era before smart phones, Expedia.com and Google, he’d plan every trip with an actual map, usually on the john. He’d collect articles during the year of […]
DYING LAUGHING
When you lose a loved one, the funeral process is, at best, bewildering, exhausting and eye opening. You literally go from having had a conversation with your loved one the day before to deciding how many people you need to feed at a meal after the funeral service in a matter of hours. You make […]
The 8 Simple Rules My Dad Taught Me Before He Died
My father was a piece of work. He was kind and he had a scathing tongue. He was thoughtful and he never forgot a transgression. He had the memory of an elephant yet could never understand Facebook. He lived in Texas with a thick, unapologetic Boston accent and he was a Yankee in a sea of […]