The Keeper has scary news, bitchachos. Big SCARY news. But, before I divulge my big news, I’m going to give you a little background information to set the stage, if I may. When I started this blog in March 2013, I’ve often said that I had very low expectations. I was encouraged by a friend […]
My Apology: My Tween Can’t Say “I’m Sorry” And It’s My Fault
On a hot summer night last year, you defied me. You begged to be allowed to walk down to an ice cream shop with your younger sister in the small beach town where we were vacationing. “I’m twelve now, Mom,” you pleaded, “almost thirteen. Come on, please?” After a bit of discussion, your father and […]
Musings From A Sleep Dictator
I am a member of the Today Show’s Parenting team (I don’t want to brag buuuuuuuuut, I’m a TOP CONTRIBUTOR, thankyouverymuch) and this month, they challenged us to discuss a topic near and dear to my heart: Sleep Training. Specifically, they asked us to give tips from our journey to a good night’s sleep. Because […]
Come On, Get Happy
This month, the Today Parenting Team challenged me to write about what makes me happy as a mother and to define the strategies I use daily to find every day joy in the chaos of parenthood. As I thought about this topic and ruminated on what really makes me truly happy, I realized that, for […]
School Daze: 13 Tips For Back To School Success (The Keeper On Today)
As many of you know, I am a regular contributor to the Today Show’s Parenting Community. This month, the Featured Challenge is “Back To School Advice, Pay It Forward Style”. I was asked to write a piece with advice for moms and dads with children younger than mine. Here’s the piece, as it appears on […]
I Miss The Noise and It’s Too Quiet
Today, when our eyes met in the aisle, my heart ached. I sighed to myself and realized I miss you. Well, not the actual you because, until today, we’ve never met. I miss the you that you are right now. The you that I am no longer. As you pushed your red cart containing your […]
I Talk Early And Often To The Fruit Loops About Alcohol
I’m just going to say it out loud: I’m a good time at parties. A gooooood time, I tell you, and my friends will all willingly recount at least three stories that involve me, a party and adult beverages. Okay, probably five stories each and those who attended my 40th birthday party last Fall all […]
Enjoying Summer Time Can Be Easy….Sort Of
Summer is here. We are a week into summer vacation and already, I’ve heard the words “I’m bored” and “There’s nothing to doooooooo” and, my personal favorite, “There’s nothing gooooood to eat in the pantry”. Yep. Summer with kids is AWESOME. And HARD. It’s hard to keep them busy, it’s hard to find time to […]
The Day I Met Tom Brokaw. Sort of.
When I was eight years old, my dad asked me if I wanted to skip school for the day and tag along on some of his business calls in New York City. My eight year old ears could barely believe what they were hearing: I’d always heard about the mysterious New York City and I couldn’t […]
Listen To The Keeper
Ever since I was a little girl, I’ve wanted to be on stage. In fact, when I starred in the critically acclaimed play “The Little White Rabbit Who Wanted Red Wings” at the age of six, a star was born. As I hopped around my elementary school stage, my parents tell me they realized they […]
50 Shades of Blush, er, Grey
In the summer of 2012, almost every woman I knew had their face buried in their e-reader. My friends could be found at the pool, sunglassed and sunscreened, discreetly reading while their children frolicked in chlorine. I’d see women at Barnes and Noble buried in their Nooks, coffees steaming as hot as their loins. I’d […]
Gratitude
Recently, I was invited to write a piece for one of my favorite blogging sites, BLUNTMoms. The editors asked me to write about the best advice I’d ever received and about gratitude. Pfft. Sounds like a cake assignment, right? Yep. Easy peasy. Until I sat down to write it and stared at a blank computer […]
The Keeper Gets Interviewed
I am celebrating a BANNER week, people. Huge. Epic. It’s one of those “doesn’t come round often” kinds of weeks, I tell you. You might want to sit down for this: I was interviewed not once, but TWICE, this week. Yep. TWICE. SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!! Two separate bloggers emailed me questions that they A). actually wanted me […]
Go To Blazes, You Stupid Gorilla
This week, I was invited to guest post on Nicole Leigh Shaw’s Ninja Mom Blog under her wildly popular “Character Assassination Carousel” section. For those not in the know, the CAC is a collection of hilarious essays by bloggers far and wide lampooning, skewering and roasting the children’s books we’ve come to hate reading night, […]
My KICK ASS Eulogy
When you die, what will people say about you? What will the people around you choose to fit into a teeny tiny column in the paper in the midst of their angst over your untimely demise? Will your eulogy be the standard issue “He was born, he was an engineer, he was a Knight of […]
THIS is BLOGGER IDOL!
True confession time: I am a SUCKER for American Idol and I’ve secretly wanted to be a contestant for years. There was a time when my BFF and I discussed the AI happenings more than any two humans should: Audition city train wrecks? Yes, please! Simon Cowell (come back!!) lambasting a performance as “Cabaret”? You […]